Even Oscar Pistoffius! Pistoffatus? Pistori....Pistori-something. Granted! That side of him might be a biiiiiiiiiiit difficult to see right now? Since it is alleged that he kinda....shot his girlfriend four times on the morning of Valentines Day!
Ahhhhhhhh yeS! The Valentines Day gift that evvvvvvery girlfriend wants! No pulse! But?!? I'm sure he cried when he was being arrested for murder. And there you have it! Proof of soft and mushy. I-I think O_o!
I honestly thought I was being singled out and picked on by Venus when today rolled around and Geese didn't magically appear in front of me? In person. Couple that with being banished to the interior of my home for now, the fourth day straight and being unable to stay awake for any decent lengths of time? You have to admit. All evidence pointed squarely in favour of my theory.
But ay? After reading that? Like, I kept seeing, Oscar this, Oscar that, and then with the broadcasted jokes and everything. Now you take that and my already deepening-by-the-minute feelings of isolation at the hands of Venus? Ofcourse, I did exactly what any interested citizen with an internet connection, would do. I googled, Oscar shot girlfriend!
I've been humbled. And thankful that at worst? Let's see...how did Geese put it? Hmmmmmmm? Oh yeah! Thankful that at worst.....my blood pressure is as low as a dead person. I know. You're asking the person to your left, "But why would she be thankful for low blood pressure?" Because I live.
Unlike Oscars now, ex-girlfriend. A FHM model, I might add! For her to have been a long-time girlfriend and then be mistaken for a burglar by none other than......Oscar, the long-time now, ex-boyfriend? You think you know a person...smh!
All that tells me? Is that Pretoria must have a wholllllllllle 'nother calibre of burglars. Eh? Our burglars? Police Files models at best! I hope for his sake that he didn't kill her on purpose. Although? Four times...hmmmmmm? Kinda hard not to get that impression.
Look?!? Was she covered from head to toe that she was thaaaaaaaaat unrecognizable? And then? Okay. Okay. Benefit of the doubt. Sometimes people don't switch the light on when there's a burglar in the house. You don't wanna scare them. With light. Did he just shoot wild in the dark but then just so happennnnnnn....to hit the target....four times? The scream from when the first bullet hit? Still not enough of a clue, huh? No?
Allllllll that aside! What confuses me the most!?! Didn't he know that in South Africa, it's illegal to shoot a burglar...BEFORE they shoot you?
And now? On that cheery note? I wish all the love birds out there, a wonderful Valentines Day. Love is a beautiful thing. When you find it? Treasure it, nurture it and most of all? Don't mistake it for a burglar!
Happy Valentines Day, Geese!
Sent via my BlackBerry from Vodacom - let your email find you!
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