Crazy Times with my Family....and Cruzzy pups

Thanksgiving Ramble

Happy Thanksgiving, to all of you celebrating this holiday tomorrow!! ^_^!!!!

I'm just sitting here thinking.

O_O!

Heyyyyyyyy! Don't run! Come backkkkkkk! Please? Hmmmmmpf! Well, ima type it out anyway, 'cause I know one day when you're bored...or drunk, you're gonna come back on here and read!

Every country should have a Thanksgiving Day. Don't you think? You're welcome to answer that upon your return. It should be a pre-requisite, like..."Hmmmmmmmmmm? So (tap fingers on desk). You wanna be a country, do ya? Well, you gotta have a Thanksgiving Day! If not! You shall remain a nameless piece-a-earth for alllll time!"

Whoever passes the "Become a Country" applications? They haven't given any thought to world peace. That much is clear! And I'm not tryna win Miss Universe here. Ya Rambler is merely a citizen of the earth, wanting each country to experience at leeeeeeeeeast one day where everybody is thankful for everybody else and everything that they have! For me, that's the first step to peace. Accepting and appreciating what you have and who you have in your life.

'Cause, look! When countries declare war? You think it's because they're happy with what they have? Oh hell no! They're happy with what that ottttther country has! They've peered their sneaky little spying asses over that border and they want it! First sign of unappreciativeNESS! Tsk. Tsk. Tsk! Even though one of the Ten Commandments state clearly that we should not covet our neighbours possessions! Heathens!

And and and!!! We should allllllllll have Thanksgiving on the same day! At the same time! Uh-huh! Yeah. Okay I admit, that one will be a teeny tiny bit tricky. Some of us will begin Thanksgiving at 9pm or something ridiculous like that, you know? Depending on how far away you are from the Equator or-or Antarctica...but the main thing is that the whole world will be sharing a meal, together! I would give you give permission to eat late on Thanksgiving!

Added to that! There should be a non-negotiable clause forcing the government of each country to forfeit the millions they're saving for "important things", at least some of it, let's not cause them to break out in hives, and feed the homeless too, on World Thanksgiving Day!

Me? I'm yet to experience being in the US over the Thanksgiving weekend and ohhhhhhhhh how I want to! I've made sure not to cross it off my wish list! And you know what happens when I do that, huh? That's right! I leave it righhhhhht on that sucker!

It looks so much like Christmas with my family here at home! In the movies! I watched that Madea movie. Heyyyyy, don't shoot the messenger! >_<! Rats! Wrong cliche'. Don't shoot the learning from the movies concept. They're based on some level of reality. Not those alien ones, but! Those are based on someone's nightmares. Or dreams. Orrrr, something their parents threatened them with as a child, if they didn't go to bed by curfew. Depends on who it is, I suppose!

I'm not into those. If I'm answering "what is your favourite typa movie?" in the Cosmo? I would need to be high on anti-nflammatories to nail choose c) Sci-fi! That's what I do, I make a line through my choice with my nail. Just in case I change my mind when I don't fall into the best category of whatever quiz I'm taking. Hahahahahahha, you know you redo them too if the answers you chose, lead you onto be the worst girlfriend/boyfriend, ever known to history.

That by no means, means, that they're bad. They're not. I honestly respect the creativity and imaginative effort that goes into those and good for you, if you're running to the movie house on opening day but sci-fi?!? Eh! I'd crawl slower than a tortoise with knocked-knees to see those. Each to his own!

Howevvvvver?!? I did enjoy the last Men in Black where Will found out about his dad and everything. Something about sadness in movies makes me happy watching them. O_o! Call me sadistic and I'll be very sad. Uhhhhhhhh, I mighta left that open to misunderstanding. My own sadness? Doesn't make me happy. Just others'. Getting paid to pretend to be.

Well? My shoulder's on fire, lemme rest it for a while. Here's wishing you a wonderful, family-filled day with lots food and leftovers for breakfast! Be safe and blessed!

Love
The Random Rambler

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Armour

Sticks and stones, it felt as though you loved me
Until I watched you stop just to start throwing
Aiming fire from your tongue, doesn't it burn?
Now that the seasons changed to your turn

I wear this armour, spray my truth like a repellent
To keep you further from me, than an arms length
Pulled my head outa the clouds, reality's a lighter tone
In time, before a thumb completely crushed my last bone

Guarded me from influence, 'til I cracked open that lock
Noosed my neck with chains, sunk me with an anchor block
You didn't expect to return to find me swimming myself free
Throwing your trap net but I've drifted out too far to reach me

I wear this armour, spray my truth like a repellent
To keep you further from me, than an arms length
Pulled my head outa the clouds, reality's a lighter tone
In time, before a thumb completely crushed my last bone

Setting my sights on the horizon, I've been where the shore's crash
Where the water shallows and runs from grains of sand

Stacey A. Kell
South Africa
2013.11.25







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Happy Birthday, my Swinging Door

Happy 19th birthday, Paige. May God come first always, may you believe in my love for you always, may you know your worth always, may you put thought before decision always but most of all may you love and forgive yourself always so that you know the measure of love and forgiveness you should always have for others.

Fulfil your purpose with grace & greatness. Limits are the stoppers we place on our own doors of achievement. Realize that a swinging door needs no stopper, it stays fastened on its hinges yet is able to open to its furthest point, not forgetting where it started at. Go be that swinging door, my sugar. I'm already proud of you! I love you, <3, Mummy


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Wrapped in Tricks

D'you know what I did today? Wished that I knew what youuuuuu were doing today! Okay, okay, you got me! That wasn't my wish. Ya Rambler was way too busy falling in love! Yep! You read me right! I fell in love affffffffffter I went to the bank, grocery shopping, unpacked, vacuumed and washed the dishes! See, you gotta get ya to-do list outa the way first. Thennnnn, you're free to have ya heart captured. Some of us? We do things the other way around, things don't work out, and if you're that "blame it all on someone else" type, then we blame our ex-partners for our own choices. Sometimes, even to the point of blatant lying jusssssssss to make yourself look and feel better. Tsk tsk tsk. That's not how it's done. But if you're one of those who takes responsibility for their own choices? Then go on ahead and fall in love before you do the groceries! You'll be alright!

Aren't you happy for me, though? It's been a while since I've felt this. He clung to me and held onto my finger! Tight! Put his silky soft cheek against me while I held him close.....

Annnnnnnnnnd?

He's just three days old. Uh-huhhhhh, got you there, didn't I? You were expecting some juicy, torrid, love story, weren't you?! Well? Sorry to disappoint you....I met my beautiful nephew this afternoon for the very first time!

Hey, can I ask you something real quick.....What is it about holding a newborn baby that makes you think about the time you willingly wrapped your entire body in clingwrap? That ever happen to you? I was sitting there oooooooh-ing and aaaaaaaah-ing and suddenly?! Visions of myself in clingwrap laying on my mums couch start crowding my thoughts! O_O! Maybe its because I was trying to lose the baby weight after Paige was born? She's nineteen tomorrow! And because I was holding baby Juan, it triggered off memories of one of the stupiD-IST moments in my life? You think? Or or or, how about this.....Maybe it was because....>_<! Nope! That's it. That's all the maybe's I got.

I wonder if we have a brainstorm session on dieting? I wonder if we can actually count the number of tricks that women, AND men, have tried through the ages, just to lose weight, when all it really takes is eating right and exercising.

For me? THAT's the tricky part right there! Not the clingwrap trick, or the drinking seaweed juice trick, haven't tried that one, but there's still time...what about eating nothing but grapes for weeks on end? That one? I think I made it through half the day.

When I see "Best results when combined with a kilojoule restricted diet" My immediate response is, "Aaaaaaargh, way toooooooo many restrictions there, nexxxxxxxxxxt!?" When I read the label and it says, "Best results when combined with exercise" The next words outa my mouth are, "You know what? I don't feel thaaaaat fat afterall!" Off to the sweet isle to reverse the effects of having to read such traumatising statements!

Look? Man cannot live on eating right and exercise, alone! Chocolate has to feature sommmmmmewhere in there. It's only fair! I refuse to believe that I was put on this earth, NOT to eat chocolate, or?!? Or to exercise with weights and all. What's that all about?!?! Wrapping myself in clingwrap and sweating to a standstill wasn't part of the plan too, I'm sure. But hey? If you haven't pretended to be left-over roast chicken at least ONE time in your life? Then clearly you have. Not. Lived!

I didn't lose weight laying there like peeled carrot that would be used for tomorrows dinner, shocker, but I gave it my best shot! I perspired as best as I could! That's called effort! And a waste of clingwrap. Did I tell you how gorgeous my nephew is? He has these dimples, and this cleft and a mouth you just wanna stare at while you lay there like a clingwrapped mummy. It'd take your mind off hoping and praying that your boyfriend didn't choose to surprise you with an early visit!
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Fling the Cat Outa The Bag, Why DONTCHA!

Guess what's on the front page of our newspaper today?  You ready?!!?!?!?   

SHORTAGE OF BREATHALYSERS HAMPER POLICE! 

Now youuuuu tell me?  Tell me anything.  Please!  ‘Cause this?  This tops the dim-witted list for me!  And I hope that you’re holding on to your chair because there’s more!  These very generous journalists then go on to say…..Motorists who drive drunk this festive season in Durban could get away with it because many officers in the city don't have access to breathalysers!

HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHAAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHHA!!!!!!!!!! 

Hold on while my facial expression turns to humorous disgust! 

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!

DISGUST!

Stupid stupid STUPID!  NO,  not me!  These clowns who have just told all of the festive seasons drunk drivers in Durban, “You there!  Yes, you with the possible innate fear of being arrested for the zero tolerance limit we just told you was implemented?!!  Get ya drink on!  Jump in ya car!  Kill your fellow Durbanites!  And you can still enjoy your Christmas!  Make sure though?  Make sure that you do it before some kind soul sponsors our police force with enough breathalysers to protect the sober drivers.  A-hem!  And their children!  You better hurrrrrrrrry!  Pssssssssssssst….The government haven’t yet realized that just the other day?  They also made it public news that they have millions in the budget for SPORTS!  Merry Christmas, you drunken hazards, you!!!!”

Dammmm?!  I'm no frequent drinker but I can imagine the twinkle in a few people's eyes right about now.  With the office Christmas party’s already on the go, this is wonderful news!  Right??? 

Isn’t it!?!?! 

No.  It’s.  Not.

Can we pretend for a while that we’re not surrounded by these circus ring leaders, and just rather use our own discretion on the roads?  Please people!  Let’s just remember…and I say, let’s, as though I belong in that drunken driving community.  O_o!  I don’t but there is strength in numbers.  Ima be a make-believe one for now.  Yep!  I love us that much.  Now?  You…love us too and do your best to keep a level head while you’re intoxicated, alright?  By that, I mean, ask your friends and family to hide ya car keys and make it your duty to tell them that should you begin to perform about who’s car it is, to slap you twelve times in your mouth, sixteen times on both ya eyes, so that you have no choice but to shut up and sleep!

Just because the hand of foolishness has been extended?  There’s no law that states, we’re to grab ahold of it! 

Be safe out there.  I always found that key words are easier to remember than entire sentences.  So here are some to help you along.  You’re welcome to  print them out and make keycards if you need.  Give your family as gifts even!  

Family/Friend

Hide Keys

Cause scene

SMACK!

Twelve times mouth

Sixteen times both eyes

Shut up

Sleep

Family Reunion 2013

It was amazing!!!! I just got home now, left most of them still on the dance floor!

That's all I'm gonna say for now...as well as? My feet feel as if I've walked over hot coal, on purpose and I need a shower after dancing my ass off like that tonight!

Peace, Love and Family Joy to you all, Goodnight! I'm so happy! ^_^! Just like THAT!
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Temperature Torture

I just said to Durban, "Ima tell!" So here I am, telling you how unbearably hot it is! It's HOTTTT! Did I say it's HOT?!? Yes, I did! It's HOTTTT! OMG, I can barely muster up the energy to tell you how HOTTT it is! HOTTTTTT, I telya! Just had a cold shower after dance class and it mattered NOT! Because it's too HOTTT!

What was that? AIR-CON, you say? Hm-mmmmmm.....SINUS, I say! And now? Let's alllllllllllllllllll say, SUFFER!! Or better still?! Nobody talk! SILENCE IN THE HOTNESS! BANG BANG BANG! It's too HOT to listen!

Feeling 'OT 'OT 'OT! That's a party song, by the way. Somewhere in there it has lyrics that go, "Soul on fire..." See that? You see what happens in Durban when it's this Summer time? Soul's catch a light! Thennnn?! Then volcano's and shit, they erupt and the lava begin's to......No, they don't. We don't have volcano's. Just Table Mountain out in Cape town. You should visit. I'm serious. If you're bored with your cool soul? I recommend Durbs!

Mannnnnnn! It's too HOT to sit, stand, bend, stretch. Yes, yesssssss, I went to dance class and I stood and bent and stretched! But that's different. Those movements have a purpose. Uh-huh! That's it, that's it! To make the Rambler happy! ^_^! This heat? Does this..*_*!

It just thundered! Cindy, and posssssssibly Delon, must be well on their way to a spot under their bed right about now. I can't help but come to that conclusion. Judging from how she reacted to the lightning on our way home from dance? I could very well be right! Poor cuz of mine damn near pee'd in her briefs! Now you know how to scare Cindy! Make it storm.

Question...Do any of you still cover all the mirrors and stuff when it's storming like our parents did when we were young? >_< I don't. I'm just asking 'cause you really don't have to. This is millennium lightning. It doesn't aim at mirrors anymore. It goes straight for appliances now. And then you have to call your insurance. They will send you claim forms and once they see that you have a legitimate claim? They'll insist that you prove that it was lightning, making sure to rule out the weather report as a supporting document! What are we then left with? Staring at a tv that even though we know, that bastard is not ever coming back on...we try, give it some time, try again, give it some time...until we can only bitch and moan about how the insurance company surprised us with a new, secret condition of claim!

Hahahhahahahahhahahhahaha! I shouldn't laugh. -_- Sorry, gran. One guyfawks evening, everybody was out busting crackers, right? My gran's dog was abnormal, to begin with. Dog's are usually cowering in a corner because of the crackers. Neoooooooooh! Granny's dog would run after them and try to bite them. Hey, granny named him Pedro. That could be the reason why he was acting out. We'll never know. Either way? Out of everyone? The lightning decided to strike granny's umbrella! LMAO! Thank goodness for rubber handles! Pedro didn't see, though. He was cracker-chasing at the time. Which, now that I think about it, was a good thing. I'd hate to think what he woulda done, had he seen sparks flying off granny's umbrella.

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You won

Darkened ashes, blow, blow away
Ugly bitterness, lying while you fray
What's winning gonna do?
Can you even look at you?
With that spit, all spoilt and vile
That venom, your typical style
What's winning gonna do?
Can you even look at you?
Lift off, blend in with the air
Furthest, far, far from my stare
Turned beautiful into monstrous
Heavy thumbs, so easy to miss
What's winning gonna do?
Can you even look at you?
Rotten, crumble, crumble, crumble
Spewing your mind, you should mumble
Black paint, dressed in shame
Stinks, that mouth, words you claim
What's winning gonna do?
You won, you're left with you

Stacey Kell
South Africa
2013.11.13
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PASSPORT AFFAIRS

Wellllllllllllllllllll!!!  That was a bust!  Ehhhh, half-a-bust.  Not a breast bust.  Like in things didn’t completely work out according to plan, bust.  At least one of you are sighing about, ”What is she on about now?”

This….

Paige, Cruz and I visit the Home Affairs to apply for passports for her and Damon.  Before I go any further, lemme just say…a visit to the Home Affairs is like voluntarily sticking out your toes while being held captive by someone who has a fetish for removing toenails with a plias. 

So?  Off we go.  Things are going great.  We got there in one piece.  The security let us in with our puppy.  Place was empty.  I’m thinking, “What luck is this?!  Whooooo-hooooo!  At this rate, I wouldn’t mind coming to apply for more passports.  Pity I don’t have any other kids man, dammit!”  At the passport window…#8 to be precise, I look to the right and they’ve stuck this notice on the glass, right.  Hell!  They even laminated it!  This was serious!  Plus…wait for it…………………………….it was typed!

It starts off with, "Before you stand in line for a passport application, make sure you have the following..." 

Translation

"LOOK, YOU TRAVEL-DOCUMENT-APPLICATION-MAKING MUTHA@*#!  DON'T BE WASTING OUR TIME COMING HERE!  JOINING THE DAMN LINE!"

And then with a softened voice, "Without the following..." :-/ 

Call me sensitive.  But I thought that was a teeeeeeeny tiny bit confrontational.  You know what?  There really isnt a need for notices to have attitudes.  It’s unbecoming.  Of-of notices.  To lack, you know, friendly tones.  Especially, since they forgot to list a few requirements.  There I was, with an envelope with my documentation tucked tightly under my arm, staring at the typed, laminated page, trying to figure out if there’s a chance that manners might ever make a comeback! 

I was psyched, nonetheless.  If you’ve ever been to one of our Home Affairs offices, you’d know that being there and realizing that you’re next in line within the first fifteen minutes of walking in?  That’s a lot to be excited about.  Annnnnnd then? 

It was my turn. 

I was polite. 

She was stern. 

I took out my documents, thinking, “She reminds me of someone.” 

She was none-the-wiser about my thoughts while awaiting my documents. 

I hand her the documents, thinking, “Ohhhh yeah!  She looks like that actress who played the dying mother and the children who didn’t really like each other anymore.”

She asked me who it was that was applying for the passport. 

I tell her. 

She ruins my day. 

I am helpless!

You'd think that if a notice can have that much buck?  That along with the ID document and birth certificate and copies of ID document and birth certificate requirements?  They'd include, “bring father and child, (no copies required)” as well. 

So ofcourse, I couldn’t get Damon’s done, but because Paige is eighteen now, she gets to sign for her own application.  Hence the half-a-bust!  At least now, I know what to expect next time I go there.  Last I put my foot in the Home Affairs office was after my divorce when I booked my ticket to the US, without realizing that my passport had expired!  >_<!  Carriage before the horse syndrome.  I’m cured now.  And this time, I can’t afford to make any mistakes.    

Blood IS Thicker than Water

How do you interpret that statement?  Ooooooooo – don’t even make me come there!  The title!  I’m talking ‘bout the title of today’s blog.  My interpretation of it is that family always matters.  Quick, easy, surface assessment.  It goes way deeper than that when you get into the crux of what family actually means.  And there again, everybody has their own opinions, which hey…that’s how it’s meant to be.  We’re meant to have our own opinions.  We have brains.  Our own.  Which means, we own our brains.  Shocker!

The reason I bring this up?  The answer is simple.  We cannot exist alone.  It's unnatural and totally unfulfilling.  We were never created to be loners and I, straight up, don't want to live a life where it’s just me, myself and Irene, my imaginary friend.  See ‘cause when I’m alone in my room, sometimes I stare at the…ooooops.  But LL Cool J was right, when I’m alone in my room, just like him, sometimes I do stare at the wall…or outside, or at my nails, trying to decide whether I should paint them black or not.  It’s staring all the same, and when my conscience calls?  I pick up.  “’’Sup C….”  You know, for Conscience.  Yeahhhh.  Thrilled for the company but anxious about what it’s gonna yell at me about this time!

If there's one thing that I can't stand about myself, it's being as gullible as I am at times.  I came wayyyyyy too close to turning my back on the entire concept of family - the enjoyment, the forgiveness, the acceptance, the regardless love and all the rest that comes with having this very special group of people in my life, which by the way included long-time friends that have come to mean exactly what family does, in exchange for promises that never saw the light of day.  Tsk tsk tsk!  Shame is me!

Worst part is this.  I was doing it just to fit in with and gain the approval of an entirely different set of people with which I had nothing in common with, except for that we need oxygen to breathe.  Even as I sit here, I can hardly recognise the person typing this, when I think about who she was just a few months ago.

But that’s okay though, and do you know why?  Because throughout the centuries, human’s have erred.  If you listen to every single negative thing said to you or about you, let me tell you something.  You will land up scraping your self-esteem off the same floor that you’re lying curled up into a ball on.  Last I checked, I was an erring human too and I know for a fact that that will certainly not be the last error in judgement that I make.  All that matters to me is that I recognize my mistakes and try my damnedest never to repeat them.

Just be who you are because I can tell you with all of the certainty that I can muster up.  Not everyone will accept you, and just the same, not everyone won’t.  It’s a totally different feeling being around anyone with whom you feel that kinda freedom of just, “this is me” as opposed to being around those where you feel the need to be paranoid.  At the end of the day, it gets you nowhere.  When Geese professed to the world just a short time back that our relationship was a reallllllly bad one for him and that he was so relieved for ultimately not making the mistake of marrying the wrong woman because of how totally opposite our personalities are?  I admit, that hurt the eyeballs to read, firstly because I knew he was talking about me and seriously, which one of us honestly wants to be thought of as a wrong anything, despite the situation.  But once I’d realized that he was dead on the money as far as all of it and that we'd inadvertently avoided a disaster?  Peace prevailed, disappointment walked away and contentedness remained.

Far as the actual relationship?  I don’t regret it.  I’d be lying if I said we didn’t have good times.  There are lots of things that I wouldn’t be doing right now, had I not met him and a lot things that my eyes were opened to, by him.  Only, as far as who I was becoming because of it.  That part, I do regret.  Since then, I’ve managed to undo most of the damage I’ve done with regards to my other relationships with friends and family.  Here’s something else that I have an opinion about.  When a friend that you’ve once hurt can understand why you did what you did, forgive you and move forward as if none of it ever happened?  That’s what family means.

And that, aside from it most importantly being my beloved mother’s birthday today, is another reason why I am here talking about the importance of family.    
 
Plus!?!?  Plus!  It's our family reunion in a week!  Whooooooooo-hoooooooooo!

I shudder.

You weren't expecting me to shudder after the whooooooo-hooooooo, were you?  Well?!?  I came to my senses!  With this crazzzzzy family of mine?  Anything is possible.  All one needs to keep in mind is that it sure as hell will be memorable!  That's the part I love the most about being a branch of this particular tree.

Look, every family has their ups and downs, right?  In every family, there’s that one cousin who thirty years ago, decided to twerk!  Yep!  You read it right!  I said twerk.  Granted back then, it mighta been a nameless phenomenon but her description of it?  Was twerking.  My late uncle slapped her sohhh hard!!!!  That in fear and shock, her curlers detached themselves from her hair.  Haaaaaahahahahahahhahaha!  Those things happen in all families.  But guess what?  She remembers that incident to this day yet on the day that my uncle passed, she was there, right along with the rest of us, sitting around him on his bed.  That’s what family means!  Not writing them off one by one until you’re only left with Irene!    

That story, I just heard it today!  And he slapped her that hard because one of HIS friends passed away and he didn't appreciate her having fun in my grans house with her other female cousins.  As I listened, it became clear to me.  The girl wasn't aware that she was meant to be mourning HIS friend’s death.  What was clearer was that they didn't know he was anywhere near the house at the time!  SURPRISSSSSSSSSSE!!!!!!  Poor thing!  That would shock the shit outa my curlers too!

So we spent the day at my mums yesterday, having a meeting about the reunion, looking at old pics, crying with laughter at stories like the one I just told you.  Hey!  I'm not sadistic.  You try picturing someone getting smacked outa their curlers and tell me if you can keep from laughing!  She was like, "I didn't know he was even watching from the window!  I had my panty in my bum, there were only the female cousin’s there, so I was dancing and playing the fool!  Next thing I know, he walks in, slaps me across the table so hard, my rollers went flying outa my hair!  Did I get the shock of my life!  No, you know why?  They all got slapped by him before, it was my first time!"  Lmaoooooo!!!  I musta been a good child, 'cause I never once got slapped by my uncle happy hands.  Ehhhhhhhhhhhhh, but then again, I'm ten years younger than they are.  I was still cute and cuddly when he went on his slapping spree.

The last reunion we had?  Damon was just a year old and someone gave him a sweet that caused him to test the concept of generosity, “If I try to swallow this whole, let’s see if I get another one!”  He might still be given a sweet at this one.  Just...hopefully he won't try to choke on it!  I'd hate to have to jump up and down on his stomach wearing denim and white.  

Back then too, Paige was still daring enough to get on a stage and dance a newly-learnt routine with the rest of her cousins.  You shoulda seen them!  Without a doubt, it'll snow in Durban the next time you see her do that, but I remain hopeful.  You know.  Mothers always do.  I was also still married.  My hair was shorter than some of the men there plus I wore lipstick.  >_<!  I don’t know who the heck that person was.

Just had a thought.  Have you noticed how many times in my life I don’t recognize myself?  Starting to sound like cause for concern…

This reunion?  My life is nowhere near what I just described!  I'm now divorced with hair down my back, opposed to lipstick!  Two teenagers on either side of me.  Older, and yes, wiser.  A lot wiser.  You know what I've learnt and I’m only telling you this out of the goodness of my heart.  It’s important and you should really pay close attention.  I've learnt that one should never not carry flats to a high-heeled event.  You're just asking for trouble.  This smile of mine fades pretty rapidly when I come to find out that the event I've been invited to, is a heel-wearing one!  Aaaaaaaargh!  These feet were made for sneakers and I see absolutely nothing wrong with wearing a nice Chuck with a tailored suit.

Wellllllllllll?
Apparently, there is.
If you're a lady.
Hmmmmmmpf!

Sometimes, vagina's sure do work against you. :-/  SMDH!

Yappy B in the Hiz-House!

My grandson has arrivvvvvvvvvvved! Love love love love!


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