Remember I told yall that we had that get together at my cousins yesterday? Yeah, so the last of the mohecans were left and sex became the topic, hehehe! Fun! There was a clear divide amongst the healthy and the, hmmmmmmm? What can I call them? The "how the hell can you have sex every night" group! Hahahahhahha!
So there was a couple there who said they had sex every day, sometimes more than once a day. One member of my family was flabbergasted like, "Every day?!?! WTF!? Who the fuck has sex every single day?????? Sicko muthafuckers!" "Well?" I thought, ".....them! And lot's of other couples who are married and still very much attracted to each other and there's nothing at all wrong with that."
So I tried to explain to her, "That's called having a healthy sex life!" Flabber (I'll call her that) was not receiving that! She was breathlessly opposing the healthy part and calling it all kinds of crazy and I said to her, "But don't you see how close they are as a couple? That plays a huge part in a relationship!"
One of them claimed to have sex once every six months! O_O! YIKES! And that statement too was simply dismissed as lies, lies, lies and more lies by another family member! Hahahhahahahhaha! As I said? Fun! I remained quiet for the most part. Except for my many outbursts of laughter at the funny shit that was being said!
I enjoy being quiet. Taking it all in. At some point, I begin talking to myself about what it is that's being discussed and then I really looked at it? I saw the stark difference in the relationships of the opposition parties seated at that table and when I compared the two? It was crystal clear that a healthy sex life within a marriage, whether married for ten years or thirty years, dramatically improved that relationship.
I was Flabber once. Yup. I was one of those people who said out loud, "I can live without sex, who needs that shit!" But a Flabber, I am no longer. Not because I'm a nympho but because I have lived and I have learnt. And everyone who hasn't experienced such attraction will never understand the NORMALITY of being that sexual with their partner. Now? I will never understand why a couple would want it any other way!
Who wouldn't want to be with someone that they wanna run home to every single day? Who wouldn't want to be with someone that they can't take their hands off of? Be excited about? Fantasize about? The intimacy between couples who have a healthy sexual relationship, from what I see? ls unlike any other.
It's not to say that sex alone makes a relationship. Not in the least! But like communication? It's hell important! And it's not to say that that's all ya gonna be doing like bang, bang, bang...no! But dammm, it makes you feel alive and in love and it ultimately the effects of that excitement and intimacy spills over into everything else you do, together, as a couple, as a family because how much more beneficial is it for children to witness the kind of love between their parents where so much affection and so much closeness is a constant sight for them as opposed to the kind where nothing inspires their parents to even want to sit on the same sofa?
We really do teach our children how to love and how they should accept being loved, by the relationship that we have with our spouse. We're the first example of love between a man and a woman that they will ever have and I finally understand that. I finally understand that staying together for the sake of the children harms more than it helps because what are we teaching them? That love is miserable and angry and distant?
No. No, it's not.
It's quite the opposite.
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Stacey, a good relationship between a man and a woman is far more than a penile erectile and the hole for that pole. Sex is overrated; it's just a thing to have fun with or to have babies by, but the reality is that it's just a thing. And, as all things are, in the long run (and definitely in the Hereafter)it is meaningless. The children that you won't have are those that others will have in spades. So some couples have little sex, others have more; but still the relationships endure with or without much sex. It doesn't matter. If the urges hit you, then simply pull off your clothes and engage in deep masturbatory activity. For this is what matters--the relationship you have with yourself. Whatever is going on inside your head--the demons and the flowers--, the only thing that's important is what goes on inside your lonely head. We are all lonely. No other person--friend, family, spouse--can substitute for a good explosion in your handss.
ReplyDeleteHello there. Thank you for your comment. However, as we all have a right to an opinion, mine differs from yours and that's okay. For me, great sex is part of a good relationship, a vital part of it too as it draws intimacy between the parties in that relationship. The lack thereof, in my experience, affects one of those parties almost all of the time and leads to either seeking that fullfillment elsewhere or a total breakdown of that relationship. Not everybody is lonely. Not everybody wants to be in a relationship and have their sexual needs taken care of by their hands. Then what exactly is the point of being in an intimate relationship? I know it's not to satisfy yourself whenever the need arises. On the other side of the coin, I'm sure that there are relationships somewhere out there that can sustain themselves despite irregular sex. Respect to those. Have a good day and thanks again for your comment.
ReplyDeleteThank you Stacey for your insightful reply. But I believe that people want to be in relationships because they think that they should be in one. Societal pressures foster the belief that if one is not with another one then there is something wrong that person--that he or she is anti-social, a misfit, a loser, a nothing, a zero. But people should realize that they have everything within themselves; that we are all perfect diamonds--flawless; but we have to find that diamond and see it for it manifest itself. Jesus said that the Kingdom of Heaven is nigh and within you. And I believe that it is there literally in the palm of our hands. In our hands lie everything we will ever need. "He's got the whole world in his hands" could not be more true. We eat with our hands, play music with our hands, drive with our hands, etc., etc., etc. We can find fulfillment, love and happiness in our hands; they contain the essence of what good relationships are. And they are always with us--always there for comfort and masturbatory fantasies. We should applaud our hands for what they are, and clap them in recognition thereof. So reach out and touch someone--yourself.
DeleteTrue, always speculation from the audience of society when one chooses to be alone vs being in a relationship. Much like the constant badgering of "when are you getting married" then you get married and then the badgering progresses to "when are you having children", it never seems to stop. And ofcourse such decisions should be made by you when you're good and ready, it's a personal choice. With that said,as far me personally? Something inside of me will always believe that living this life and experiencing it's highs and lows can be so much more enjoyable as well as bearable with a special somebody by your side. I just really think that it's in our make-up, at whichever point in our lives we feel that need, to seek out someone to share our lives with.
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