So, Paige's
birthday's coming up...in November,
and she's getting this Yorkie puppy, right!?
As a non-pet-ty kinda mum, I've been trying my utmost to support the fact that soon I will have another little
body running around my home. All I wanna
do is name it?!?! Is that so much to ask? That in
itself is something to write home about!
But she's being seriously uncompromising! Someone reallllllly should have a word with her about that.
Plus I've come up
with some good ones too, like, New Yorkie, Manhattan. I heart
NY. No! No, no,
that wasn’t one of the names I came up with.
What kinda fool-ass name would that be?
Yappy! Squeaky! Even Lil Y! Hehehe---kinda
proud of that one. That one came to me when she sent me this passage off the internet
that described the little pipsqueak
as a gangsta-wanna be. Lil Y, gangsta wanna-be, YO! Good one, huh?
:-/ Maybe, she got offended when I told her she's just like a Yorkie. Was that going too far? Small, yappy, squeaky and feisty. I didn't
mean it in a bad way but the truth
is, when I read that this minute hairball had a thing for challenging big dogs, I immediately saw Paige’s face
looking up at me, wagging her Yorkie tail.
Hey! If you can't tell ya daughter the truth, then
who can you be truthful with?!? Then again…could be a long-time grudge
for me not wanting her to get a tiger when she was but a wee yorkie.
IIIIIIIII
dunno...kids of today, you never can
tell. Meanwhile, she's still not
budging. In short, she told me, “Get your own puppy and name it things like
Lil Y!” In those exact words. That wasn’t enough to stop the progression of
my quest. It just motivated me to plunge further into my dog naming tank. I came up blank,
HA! But then again?!?! I was
tired last night. Been writing notes for
Damo again. Exam time,
whoooooo-hoooooo! Not whooooooo-hoooooo!
Booooooo-hooooooo!
That whole Jan van
Riebeck, Khoi-Khoi rubbish drains a person.
Who the ?+@# cares about the
goings-on of the 17th and 18th century anyway!
Before I reached that mind-numbing
part. By numbing, I mean boring to the core! My
core. And my core is not to be trusted
when it’s bored. I start thinking about dog names and we can
all see how that’s turning out.
Thing is this. I was okay
with them learning about the different diseases like Malaria and Cholera and Population Movement and all of that,
'cause when I wake up one day. Before my
alarm! Yelling frantically...”IMMMMMMMMMIGRATE! IMMMMMMMMIGRATE?!?” Many have done it, I’m sure. The boy needs to know to grab his bonny bags and run right alongside me! You know?
But then all of a sudden?!? Jan van @#!*en
Riebeck and Dutch ships that don't even exist anymore?!?! I mean, is there a Chapter somewhere in History covering the day
that my beetle broke down when I was twenty?!? No! They were wrecked already centuries ago! They admitted
as much in the highlighted notes! Crabs
have built underwater holiday apartments with those wreckage remains by now! Actually? That’s how the entire mess started!
A wrecked ship! Mmmm-hm! The ship was wrecked and then the sailors settled
there and took the Khoi Khoi’s stuff, who got pissed off and began stealing
their stuff back, IMAGINE THAT!!!!!!
Then they were all, “What is wrong with you Khoi-Khoi’s! Leave
your stuff alone!” Started building
walls and parading all armed to keep them out, then the ‘Company’ released some of their servants and gave them farms. How very kind of them.
The Khoi-Khoi were
like, “Hell to the na-aaaaah! Don’t be thinking we’re helping y’all grow
things on our things!” (think they
meant land).
Which led to a labour shortage. That’s when the ‘Company’ was like, “Hey?!? These damn lazy-ass Khoi-Khoi will not
co-operate!” I wonder why….don’t
you? “Whatever shall we do?!?! Ahhhhh-ha!
Let’s go to Jakarta and Madagascar and buy some of their people and use
them as slaves, here! As if we even have
the right! Oh well! Never stopped us before…he-he-he ask the
Khoi-Khoi!”
At this point, a
Khoi-Khoi shoulda been eavesdropping, broke the door down, and just for that he-he-he, greeted him with a flying kick. But that’s just me. I
don’t make History, however hard I
wish that I could change it. ‘Specially this part of it. And so they did. And THAT’S
how the drama unfolded! I always knew nothing good could come out of a wrecked
ship!
History means old.
But how old is old? Is there no
cut off time for oldness? Like an expiry
date of oldness? A stamp that reads, “Best taught before (insert date)” Just sayyyying…if I’m 41 years old and I learnt
all of that at Damon’s age? Come onn!
Now that you know why I was tired last night. Back to the yorkie saga. I did manage to negotiate for at least one of these to be his second
name. She said she'd think about
it. I demanded an answer by today, failing which I’d have to text her fresh
possibilities all day. She then coolly vowed to leave her phone at
home! O_O! We were on our way to work, and Wendy was
playing Keith Sweat in her car. Ohhhhhhhh!!!! The memories!
A-hem…!
So, I thought about
the puppy some more. Confused am I!?!?! As to all of the thought time this puppy is
taking up. Feel like I’ve fallen in love
with it or something! Hold on a sec……shake nod shake nod – don’t look – shake nod shake nod…just…I’m tryna empty my head of that
thought. This would be the first time I’ve
fallen in love with a dog…well?!? If you wanna be technical. Eh!
The Coloured slang
term for a person who keeps challenging others, is a ‘bumper’, is it not?
Coloured’s?!?! Help me out
here. So, I text her the name,
Bumper. She says, huh? Clearly, she thought I
was kidding about the deadline for the second-name decision. I say, Bumper
Yappy Kell.
She said, no.
I give up.
To make matters
worse, she told me that Lindsie and I
ruined it for ourselves with the names we’re coming up with. Lindsie’s been insisting that she’s gonna
call him LD, short for Lord Disick. So
then, I retorted. Hehehehe!
Yes I did! I retorted! How ya like me now? “Well ima call him Yappy B! “ Short for Yappy Bumper! This was her response;
Paige: Lmao he won’t know his name! I will keep you both away (insert some kinda
skew-faced emoticon) and that I can do.
Me: You
live in my house! I will steal him when
you sleeping and brainwash him to only respond to Yappy B!
Paige: Lmao!
I thought, LMAO,
meant that she gave in at that point, what with me pulling rank and threatening to brainwash
her birthday present?! I guess, it’s simply
a matter of…
You know what thought did….?
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