There's something just awesome about meeting your #1 blog follower whose since become your Facebook friend...in person...and not be evicted from her property within the first ten minutes! Whoop whoop!!! That's a sign that you made a good first impression! ^_^! Plus she gives you shoes! And food! And gives you the run of her kitchen to make tea! And a party-pack for your God-daughter who gave you strict instructions to bring back bubblegum as if you told her you were going to the store. I guess "party" and "shop" sounds the same to beautiful little girls?!
And now? Debbie is officially more than just a voiceless face on a social networking site. ^_^! I got solid proof of that because she has big dogs. One gigantic brown one with glow-in-the-dark eyes, the size of a medium bear! Nooooooooh?? Not the eyes? The dog! The other one was black and had very sharp features and great posture, I must say! Number three? I didn't see but I chose to accept that. I definitely was not about to roam all over the yard looking for it, in case I smelled of raw meat. I never do but there's always a first time. Come to think of it? Fear must smell like raw meat! Or dog pellets. I've heard many people say, don't show them that you're afraid 'cause they can smell fear and that's when they will try to bite you! I dunno about you? But I can't act not afraid when my knees are knocking. But the fact that she didn't give them the "eat" command while pointing in my direction?! I took that as a sure sign that we got along quite well in person!
Wendy and I thoroughly enjoyed spending time with her and her family on Saturday. Shhhhhhh....don't tell her, but I took back-up just in case things got a little one-sided. Like if was having too good a time and she wasn't and then she tried to have me forcefully removed. HA! Ay? She also told me how apprehensive she was about meeting me? Don't give me that "howwww could you?!?" Look. She made sure that she was surrounded by friends and family so if things turned tricky, she'd have back-up. Hahahhahahahha! She's gonna kill me when she reads this. Hahhahahahaha! But that's okay, 'cause she'll have to wait three months to do that and by then she'd have gotten over it. If not? Christmas won't be the same for me this year.
But?! She even gave Wendy shoes! Heh-heh-heh! I hearrrr it! But that?!? Is not gonna get you shoes! I can hear a flurry of click click click, search Debbie Surname, add friend, message Debbie Surname..."Hi there, can I meet you in person?" Just 'cause you need shoes! Uh-uhhhhhhhhh! Hold it! Stores open at 8.30am! And they might just carry your size, depending on whether the sales assistant is in a selling mood. If she's religiously angry about having to work on the Sabbath? Then unfortunately for you, every single pair in the size or colour that you ask for? You will have jusssssst missed the last pair! That's when you're gonna be wishing that you knew Debbie!
Speaking of shoes? Summer looked at my sneakers yesterday and asked me, "Whhhhhy you always got boys shoes onnnn?" I tried to pretend as though I didn't hear her by continuing to knit the slouch cap that she asked me to have finished before she left? Yep! I was bullied by a five year old who wasn't taking being ignored so she repeated herself. Now? Since I'm gonna be forty...soon. Enough!? I didn't wanna give her the impression that alllllll soon-enough-to-be-forty-year-old females end up hard of hearing so I eventually stopped mindlessly twisting purple wool around silver metal needles and gave her the honest "because they're comfortable, my sugar" speech. Well? Sentence. It's hardly a speech if its just one sentence. A speech should be at least a paragraph and therefore? One line simply can't be a paragraph! Unless you start it on a new line and immediately after the period, you start a new paragraph?
Like this.
Then it is. But the point that i so often take the long and winding road to, is that I couldn't have the child stressing herself out about losing her hearing as she ages, you know? I'm not that kinda God-mother. I may be weak to Godchildren bullying but I'm not inconsiderate. Besides? Experience has taught me that any and all stress should be saved for the overnight expansion and contraction of hips and thighs.
As a follow-up? I did infact bring her back bubblegum from Ziara's party! My reward? "Cannnnn you suck off the sour pleazzzzzze?" And then when she saw my face distorting from the way that my tastebuds were protesting!? Didn't matter! The way that my eyes shut and my jaw clenched from being grabbed and pulled tight by the extreme sensation that she was refusing to experience? Didn't matter! Summer was hell-bent on enjoying that bubblegum. At my expense. She then sweetly notes all of the negative effects it was having on me, "You don't like sour things too?" while relentlessly waiting for the job to get done! >_<!
Sent via my BlackBerry from Vodacom - let your email find you!
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