Seriously?!?

Sooooooh!!!! Renaldo sends me a message yesterday to ask me if I saw "the" article. At first, I thought we were on a top secret mission but then I figured that it was because the last thing I remember seeing on TV before I slept was The Mentalist! So? I was in investigator mode! But as any curious-minded person would? I then found out which article he was referring to? Just by asking him, "What article?" If only every investigation was that simple! And then I googled it. "I'm pregnant with my dad's baby and we are so in love."

A moment of silence...no, a day 'cause that's how long it took me to finish this blog entry...of silence is now desperately required by a person! Me!! Whose eyes were tainted by THAT! .....................................................................................................

You know what was the first thing I noticed? After I got over the nausea? It was that guilt forces one to try to find sommmmme sort of justification for the wrong that one is doing. In this case, it's two. Long-lost horny father plus desperately-seeking horny daughter equals two. "I was surprised to see how many brothers and sisters and blah blah blah are living together happily as man and wife." Reallllllllly?! Would that be on your planet? 'Cause I'm surprised to see that I don't know one brother and sister like that on mine! My chewing rate has increased dramatically. Yep, I'm chewing bubblegum, not hay! Horse shampoo is not that potent!

And I'm also surprised to see that I can actually keep it down. Excuse me. My mistake. Bubblegum is not meant to go down unless you specifically swallow it. Or get surprised-smacked at the back of the head! Or you're laying on your back and surprise-cough. 'Specially when you're told throughout your childhood about how a big bubble is gonna grow in your tummy if you swallow your grown-up given bubblegum? One tends to ensure the closure of the entrance to the throat passage while chewing! No matter the nausea level!

Now? Back to Hell's future residents. Ay! These two had better beg for forgiveness! I'm not being nasty. Yes! I'm being judgemental! But? My opinion has a voice. I'm not the one making sure that I have a foolproof, two-way path to the hot place?!?!? Lemme explain my two-way theory. Okay, here goes!

One: They are father and daughter, regardless, of the fact that they just met. He/she said that they're aren't doing anyyyyyyyyything incestuous. Awwwwwwwwwww! Sohhhh sweet to be so willingly ignorant. >_<! They aren't doing annnnnnnnything wrong. How precious is that? o_O!

Two: They're waiting to see if the baby has birth defects! Then what? They say that should it not? They will stay together and raise the baby. But what if it does? Introducinnnnnnnnnnnng........Backup plan to hell! Meanwhile?!!!!!!!! "We are victims of GSA!" BWAAAAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAA!!! GSA my size six and a half foot!

Huh? You? You don't know what GSA is? Sighhhhhh! I telya? Being a rambler is dirty job! Correction?!?!! I'm not the two being dirty here! Lemme try that again.....I telya? A ramblers job is never done! There! Thaaaaaats better! You really need to read more, else you would know what GSA is! Plus? Plus!

.................................Nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn? Guilt is setting in! I may need to find justification! Quick! Confess! I must confess before I begin saying over the top bullshit in my defense! I'm not tryna create my own pathway to the baddddd place? I shall leave that to these two very confused people! I'm well aware that I shouldn't have kids with my father! Even if I don't see him for a week. But that's just me! And all the people I currently know.

But what do I need to confess, you ask? Crap?!? What DID I need to confess?!? Oh! Oh! Oh! Only that I too, just found out, what GSA was. It came up when I searched for the story. It's not like a normal, non-genetically sexually attracted person just knows what that is off the top of their heads! Plus it sounds like something to do with milk and percentages. So now my conscience is clear. I can move on. But I still knew before you did, which gives me the right to shake my head and make fun of your lack of knowledge.

Either way. No time for jokes. This is serious. It's a serious damn joke! That's what it is! Genetic Sexual Attraction? But fine. If they wanna be genetically sexually attracted? Right now. That's fine. After the...the? Wait? Who would now go and approach them and make them stop this? The cops? The welfare? Motherland security??? Well? Whomever it might be? When they get hold of their genetic sexual attraction asses? They won't be feeling so attractive then!

Then he's trying to make it out as though, "Hey, we never met before, so it's just like a meeting a woman in a bar!" That makes it not wrong?!! Pfffffffffffffffft!!! On top of everything? Now he's insulting women in bars too! Has he no shame?

Horny Daughter: "Dadddddd?!?!?!? Oh! Daddy! I finally found you!"
Horny Dad: "Yes y'did kid!" Wanna pretend like we just met in a bar, and that you weren't created by my very own, home grown, semen?"
Horny Daughter: "Why, whatever are you suggesting?"
Horny Dad: "I'm suggesting that you and I? Me! And you! Pretend that you're late mum and I didn't...you know? Do the hump-hump...and out came you...!
Horny Daughter: "Ooooooooooh Daddy! I love it when you talk dirty!"
Horny Dad: "I'm sorry kid...I ain't brush my teeth in three days."
Horny Daughter: "That's okay. That's alright...you're my Daddy! I forgive you. And besides? I feel so genetically sexually attracted to you right now. RowwwrrrrrR"
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