Geese for President

I'm alive!  I'm alive!  Not to worry!  I didn't comatose from turning forty.  I quite enjoyed my birthday.  :-)  Sohhhhh much more than I'd planned.  Thank you, Geese!  Thank you, family!  And thank you, friends!  Not that...that I'd issued an official limit on the enjoyment like, "Tomorrow?  I'm gonna enjoy my birthday, 68%!"   Who does that?  Last year?  I thought I'd enjoy it 44%?  Dragged myself through the day but then I got home and Paige had surprised me by cooking up this dinner for me.  I was so happy, I cried.  Not 'cause I was hungry and I could eat sooner than I thought.  Just?  The added 56% was just too much for my tear ducts to handle.  The pressure....of happiness. 

That's why?  Don't wear mascara on your wedding day.  You could end up looking like the bride of Chucky and your pictures would be ruined.  Pictures paint a thousand words and all yours would be saying is, "Dammmmmmm?!?"  A thousand times.  Some people find out soon enough that, running mascara or not?  They unknowingly were the bride or?!?  Groom of Chucky!  Did Chucky’s chick have a name?  I don’t watch horrors.  And on that very rare occasion, that I did?  I’m concentrating more on trying not to see the horrific parts.  Let’s just call her Chucky.  Just for the sake of continuity.  Of what, I don’t really know but let’s just.  Hopefully?  Chucky's in prison now.  Enjoying his or her new position as the bride of Baba or Babe or something.  A-hem!  It happens.  O_O!  I hear your breath catch in your throat, like, "Myyyyyyyyyyyy word!  How dare she ramble so irresponsibly!"  Don't gasp.  It's unbecoming to gasp in public.  Behind your computer screen.  Where nobody can see you.  I, ofcourse, didn't cry at my wedding.  I was too busy getting married and trying not to trip!  Nnnnnnnnn...heels and me?  Smh!

I'm gonna be honest right now?  I'm falling asleep.  Because I'm tired.  And rightfully so.  Little sleep and a lot on your mind has a draining effect.  I’m still trying to figure out what’s our politicians excuse.  Mine is valid.  Hastiness would force me to say, lots of sleep and little on their mind but I might appear...too rapid in my judgement.  I was minding my own business when I got an email the other day.  Where?!?  Most of them were out cold!  In the hiz-house of Parliament.  That's just so sad!  So sad that not a soul thought to replace those seats with beds and a pillow.  Must I think of everything?  I would, reverse psychology, their tired asses! 

Let meeeeee become president.  Or Madam Speaker!  If that sleep in a hard seat doesn't reverse into sitting stiff and awake on a soft bed?  All future parliament meetings will be held in the deep end of a community swimming pool.  Naked!  Okay, no not naked.  Staying awake would be traumatic enough.  But see?  Attention will be paid thennn!  Now, won’t it?  Our batch of worn out officials.  See how fast you drift off into a blissful slumber with the constant, sobering thought of, "I'll wake up drowned" plaguing the sleep part of your brain. 

That's what we lack in our current government!  Innovation!  Thinking outsssside of the box!  Enough sleep at night!  An alarm that pierces the very centre of their eardrums should they even blink for over two seconds!  You know?  And Geese!  O_O!  What?????!  You have that, "Therrrrre we go again with the Geese this and Geese that!" look on your face.  He’s my hero.  Live with it.  I've always told him that he'd make a great president and I'm not being biased.  Neither am I being swayed by emotions.  I'm not.  If you ever had a chance to speak to him, you'd see why, no matter what?  I will always believe that he would very easily be able to lead multiple countries at one time.  And lemme tell you?  Far as here?  Thaaaaaat's when we'd see a "new South Africa".  This new South Africa?  Faker than an Abibas, I mean, Adidas, sold by those Nigerian street vendors on West Street.  Sorry, I don’t know its new name, and frankly?  I don’t care.  Pfffffffffft!  Geese would never have wasted time and money on new street names!  See?  See?