Saw this story on Yahoo and all over Facebook yesterday morning. Horrible. I don't know exactly what transpired inside that bar except for what the article states but I do know that nobody, woman or man, deserves to be shot and killed for something like THIS. Nobody--------woman, man, child, teenager deserves a pointless brutal end to their lives and there has certainly been too much of that senselessness going around.
When I saw this particular horror story this morning, one? It reminded me of just one of the reasons why I've made a decision to deliberately stay out of the potential dating scene. Why I don't go to bars, clubs or any of those places where one can be approached in this way. I don't drink alcohol either. That doesn't make me any better than those who do populate these places or even take a drink, don't get me wrong. And I've been called boring and a granny but gimme my cupa tea and my house and I'm good to go.
It's just...I have all sorts of anxieties about going out to these places and entering the dating world in general so the way I look at it, avoidance is better than cure. The thought alone closes up my throat. You just never know and I'd just rather not know.
Two, while this wasn't, I have experience with long distance relationships and I believe myself to be very fortunate that I didn't wind up dead from taking the chances that I have. That's not to say that I was dealing with crazed psycho's and I miraculously got away. No. In my particular experiences, I can't even say that I felt as though I was in any kind of physical danger. The reality of it was that I wasn't, which is why I said fortunate.
But that's only half the truth, being it from my point of view, isn't it? Because the perception of these kinds of situations is always that the man will hurt the woman even though we're quite aware that men are not the only ones who hurt women, violently. Women hurt men violently too.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that there are many cyber stories that didn't end like mine did. There are stories, period, cyber or not, just like this one, that didn't end like mine did because whomever I was dealing with, long distance, turned out to be the same person, in person and not some crazed lunatic luring me to the ends of the earth to harm me.
We're alive right now, to remember the good and the bad, the laughs and the tears and it's crazy, it really is, when you read or hear about an article like this and then somewhere in trying to process it all, in reflecting on the could haves, somewhere in your mind is a voice that whispers, "Thank you." Crazier too is feeling the need to give someone accolades for not physically harming you when that is just how it's meant to be but I am genuinely grateful since that's the world that we live in today. Nothing's as it should be. Where in this day and age, it's a risk to do things both conventionally as it is unconventionally.
Sent via my BlackBerry from Vodacom - let your email find you!
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