I realize that since then nothing has ever given me that feeling again. It was like every flower was in bloom, every blade of grass was green, the sky was blue and cloudless and nothing could taint any spec of beauty in the world. I felt extraordinarily complete. As if I was isolated in a bubble of absolute joy. I felt an existence, a sense of belonging, however temporary, that I can only describe as------indescribable. If that makes any sense.
Hey? I could go on and on but I don't wanna sound too (cough) corny. HA! Too late huh? Hahahahha, yeaaah, I thought so.
Here's where the guttering sadness comes in. I don't believe that anything ever will. There are some things, some people, some experiences in life that just can't and won't be replaced by others and you can search for them far and wide, up and down, over the mountain and everywhere and to be that fortunate twice, hell?!? Does that ever happen?
Never
Ever
Ever!!!
The lesson in this, I suppose, is both time and the willingness to take those leaps of faith when you're faced with these extraordinary moments in your life. You either take the chance or you watch ANY chance walk further and further away from you. Nothing waits until you think you're ready. Time certainly doesn't. Opportunity rarely does. Once you've lost both of those, you either spend your life searching for it or you settle for the next best thing.
But what you don't do? Is stop with the wondering. Stop with thinking about the what if's and the why's. Stop with pacifying yourself about however that thing happened, was how it was meant to happen. All while deep in your soul, you're feeling that empty space that nothing else will ever fill.
Sent via my BlackBerry from Vodacom - let your email find you!
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