Life

Saw this meme on FB this morning and immediately identified with it.  DO YOU SEE THE SIMILARITIES?  LOL!  Not the wake up call that I was looking forward to but a-hem......let's continue, shall we.

If you had to ask me 20 years ago about what I envisioned to be my middle aged life to be?  This would never have been it.  Not a first, fifth or final choice.  Hahahahahaha!  Ofcourse, I laugh but reality sure does bite. And why?  Because somewhere along the way, in whatever way, I did choose this life.  

Either way.  I thought I'd share one of my realist reminders of how life can go so easily switch from one reality to another and also from one dream to a totally unexpected situation.

It's both enlightening and depressing at the same time.  Especially when you know that it could be or could have been so much more.  But then that's where your own good or bad decision making comes into play.  Where your own sometimes fairytaled expectations or even lack of a sense of value comes in.  Sometimes these things, the positive and the negative parts of you, conflict and when you dont believe that your worth validates a better outcome as much as you should, you settle and wave real opportunities for happiness, bye bye. 

Sometimes you're simply afraid to take leaps of faith and that fear is crippling almost.  Fear?  That comes in big and small doses.  Even in the form of boxes that we've checked as far as what we will never do, or which type of men or women will never give a chance.  But it's effects are the same.  We create our own limits.  I read somewhere that your type might be the reason that you're always a part of failed relationships.  I think it's true. 

So much goes into what brings us to our here and now.  And if anything, life has taught me that there's no going back and pulling that moment in time outa the past and redoing it, that second chances are far and few between where even if they do come around, some of the initial result becomes limited and has to be sacrificed because well?  Life goes on and while it went on, life happened.  Rarely do you find that second chances bring with them a stagnated life, especially when they involve people, where you can just pick up where you left off.  You can't and if you can, it's not as easy as you'd like.  Circumstances almost always differ.

That's why, to you out there, you are responsible for your own happiness.  If it feels right, wasting time thinking about how that one decision will cause others to see you, you're doing your own life a disservice.  UNLESS, it causes someone immense pain or trauma, I say go for it.  

Like I said, life goes on regardless of your fear of judgement.  If you find extraordinay love, act on that.  And do it right.  That's why I love the fact that my brother and his wife woke one day and were like, "fuck it (okay not fuck it, he is a pastor, dammm, lemme start again.)  "To hell with it, we love each other, we've never been happier, it feels right, we're getting married!"  And they got married with their witnesses and a pastor.  Done.  Happier than ever.  And that's what I meant by second chances don't bring stagnated lives.  When they dated in high school, they were simply highschoolers.  Along came their second chance and it brought with it, children, ex-spouses and challenges.

If you find a better career opportunity, act on that.  The reality is, at your job especially, you are replaceable.  That company won't crumble without you and soon you won't even be thought of because the work will get done.  

Loyalty is a gem of trait to have.  But your loyalty should be treasured too and it should be returned with the same level of loyalty that you invest.  In a job, your employers loyalty lies with the success of their business, not you.  In love, your loyalty shouldn't lie with someone who in turn gives theirs to someone else.

Look, we all know right and wrong.  Wrong is what keeps you up at night wondering if hell will be your home in the afterlife  Wrong is what steals your peace in quiet moments.  But when it, let's say won't send you to burn for an eternity, sitting there worried and anxious about "what will they think of me" will get you safe and settling.  Yes, growing old with a dog for company or worse, a cat.  Hahahahaha!  Sorry, cat lovers.

The world is not sitting there, with nothing better to do than continuously watch you and judge you, they are living and grabbing their own opportunities for happiness, despite what you think.  And you can always rely of your fellow human being to distract them from you and give them something else to judge.  

Find your happiness and take good care of it when it's in your possession.