YOU CAN FEEL EACH OTHERS HEARTBEAT!
How cool is that? Cool, right?! Clearly someone's been on Tinder or something. Seen the plight of the lonely. Decided to make money off of it. Talk about retail therapy, HA!
Someone I know signed up on Tinder. Hahahahhahahaha! I mean it, don't look at me like that. I know those "friend of mine" stories too, this aint one of them. Anyway, I asked her this weekend, "So, how's the guy you were talking to on Tinder?" She was like, "Fuckin liar!" Hahahahahahahahaaaaaa! If you knew her, just that statement alone is hilarious! "He told me he is working in London, I go on Facebook and there he is under a different name!" Me? Shame really is me, I shouldn't laugh but I can't help it!
I count myself lucky on both occasions. When I met my penpal, Kobi, online? And then when we all met him in New Orleans for the Essence Festival? He was still Kobi, my crazy penpal friend. Then when I met Geese on Penpal International? When I met him face to face, he was who he said he was too. I understand now why my brother was stressing like he was when I first went over to Philly. In today's mental climate, it's actually a dangerous situation to put yourself in, in general. I have read some honest to god, horror stories about these situations.
Okay, so the ideal situation, I'm sure for many out there, is not a long distance relationship, but you fall in love with whom you fall in love with, right? And hopefully for you, that goes well. If ya love happens to be thousands of miles away? Then this ring is for yall! At the introductory price of-------
Drummmmmmmroll please----------$2990 a pair.
I choked. You just didn't know. But see? If we had our rings? 'Cause we're in a sorta long distance relationship, aren't we? You'd have heard it via my staggered heartbeat and then--------
Nnnnnnn---------:-/
I just realized that mayyyyyyybe it's not so cool afterall. 'Cause what if I you did happen to hear your partners staggered heartbeat? That could turn unfavourable in, well.....a heartbeat! Then instead of you thinking vagina thoughts, you're all stressed out thinking angina thoughts. All while you're supposed to have ya eyes closed feeling mushy inside with the ring to ya chest making your hearts beat as one. One with the hearts. Uuurgh, nevermind. Stick to calls and texts and Skype. Hell?! Better still, stick to local relationships.
Y-you, not me.
My sister in law asked me last week, "So when are gonna get a chap, here?" To make a long story short, I told her, in a few more words but they meant the same thing. "When pigs fly". Had I known about this ring then, my argument woulda been a little stronger. It woulda went from acute anxiety about regular, local dating to why? When there's a ring to bridge the distance? She'd have understood me better. But instead, she just walked away from that conversation with the conclusion that I have "issues" hahahhahahahahhaa!
I was just explaining to my daughter yesterday that I can't quite self-diagnose my "issue." It's a mix between social and anti-social, introvert and extrovert. Family functions or visits to family homes? I'm good. Movie dates with my bestie or my mum, I'm fine. Beyond that? The introvert almost always wins and if I can't get out of it, then I'm sweating bullets all the way leading up to whatever event it is. That's not to say that I won't enjoy myself when I get there, O_o! The time between the invite and the event is the problem.
Go see the ring for yaself.
http://www.higherperspectives.com/heartbeat-ring-1969018894.html
Sent via my BlackBerry from Vodacom - let your email find you!
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