Toxic Reasoning

Nothing thrills me more than knowing I have something sweet and unhealthy to nibble on when I get to work.  Which is why?  Nnnnnot very thrilled right now.  :-/  All I have is high-fibre cereal and cupa-soup!  I’m on the verge of licking that glue on envelopes and pink post-it notes!  But you know what that tells me?  I need two new front tyres!  Yup!  It’s a thrilling day alllll round!  I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason.  Nothing is co-incidence and nothing happens by chance!  Which only means that I don’t have sweets today because I needed to realize that my tyres need replacing.  'Cause you look at your empty desk and think, "What ELSE could go wrong?"  And that causes you to think about what else is going wrong.  You start visualising things and your car pops up in your mind like, "Look, I need new tyres okay?!?!"  O_o!!  And I have now realized that!  Hence my firm belief in reasons!  Don’t fight the way that you’re made aware of things!  

It matters not the source, but the substance.  >_< 

I have no idea if that even makes any sense but it sounded profound!  So ima leave it just like that!  If it’s understood by even one single searching soul out there?  I’m okay with that!  Realizations can come in many different shapes and sizes.  Like wine gums.  The black ones are rectangular and the orange….ones...are….&^%# I am so wishing for wine gums right now!  You think at the time that everything that’s happening to you is just senseless and horrible and unbearable.  That’s how I felt this morning when I walked in and saw my desk empty of store purchased goodies! 

But you think that at the time.  You know it’s a reflex.  No goodies?  Unbearably sad.  Like this L No goodies?  Senselessly horrible things keep happening to me!  And then when you’re all laid out and sick on your office floor, curled up in the fetal position from the envelope licking?  You go through, while you’re moaning.  You go through all the should haves and shouldn’t haves in your mind.  You can’t hold a pen ‘cause your stomach is too sore and then you fail at mouthing the words to your desk, whose your only friend at the time, since your tongue insists on sticking to your palate.  Glue will do that.  So you have to make mental notes.  Nothing wrong with your mental.  It’s just mad at you, that’s all. 

So mentally, you begin talking to yourself, “When that happens again?  Rather eat a spoon of sugar.  You know?”  You’re saying “you know”, like it’s not coming out of your own mind but shame, you’re delirious from pain.  And then when you look back on that a few days later?  Because realizations don’t take one day, normally.  They get deeper by the day.  So as the days pass, you then see the entire lesson in it.  Sugar!  Rather than office stationery.  And patience.  If you had just waited ‘til lunch time, you wouldn’t have been ailing from intoxicating your body with glue.

Even if you kick your toe on the corner of the wall.  That ouch ouch ouch delay that it causes?  You’re being delayed for a reason.  In my case it would be because maybe a cockroach needs to pass, and then with the delay of holding my toe and cursing at the wall about “Just damn appear out of nowhere!”  I would miss it.  And my knees won’t get all weak and I won’t feel like fainting.  My paining toe would have preventing me from feeling weak and possibly fainting.  I may have been alone at home and nobody woulda been there to help me if I fainted.  So?  Uhmmm-M!  Reason for happening!  Nuf said!

I’m somewhat perturbed that people have gone to the moon, yet?  We still need to replace the tyres on our vehicles.  Not a one person has come up with anti-smoothing car tyres orrrrr!  Or!?!  Thicker rubber and deeper…grooves so that their life spans are doubled!  A rocket that can zoom into space!!!  They can spy on the stars with satellites and all but they can’t anti-smooth rubber!  Tsk!  Tsk!  Tsk!  That’s as troubling, to me, as is the fact that they haven’t yet found a way to just make sweet things suddenly appear in people’s offices when they’re holding the sticky parts of envelopes two inches away from their tongues! 

Where are the Einstein’s of this world?  Clearly none of them have a sweet tooth, or know what comfort eating is all about.  Someone?!!!  Sommmmmmeone!!!!!!!!!  Do you think someone heard me?  Someone!!!?!  Please go depress an Einstein so that they can find a way to make the comfort eating experience less of a “go out to the store and buy your comforting sugary stash” and more of “wowwww (smile), how’d THAT get there! (smile more and unwrap)” one!  There are times when the only way one sees the urgency of certain things?  Is when someone makes them see it through their own eyes.